I am a 21 year old female named Katie and I want to say ...
From when I was about 2 till when I was 10 or 11, I lived in fear to lay down on my bed at night. It started out very frequently, maybe 4 or 5 times a week, and then slowed dissipated. When I knew that I needed to sleep, I would go to my room, lay on my bed, close my eyes and try to sleep. Sometimes, it worked. But other times, the most inexplicitly horror happened instead.
My mind starts racing absolutely uncontrollably. I find myself unable to control or understand the almost hundreds of people’s voices saying different things in different tones and languages flying around, racking my brain to pieces. If things aren’t already horrible enough, at the same time, physically, I feel the feeling of someone grabbing my wrist, but it’s that same feeling all over my body, like someone is both pushing me down, grabbing me, and laying on top of me, so I feel completely paralyzed. This is just the beginning stage (I would soon figure this out as I grow older), so, by this time I’m usually trying to scream “Mom!” as much as I can before I can’t talk anymore, but as much as I cry to scream, I would be lucky if a little whimper came out of my mouth. But the worst part is about to come: I try desperately to have the slightest bit of control over my thoughts and actions by concentrating on one particular movement I want to carry out. Normally I could think “I am going to move my leg” and a second later, I would move my leg. However, during these episodes, if the thought even barely, barely crosses my mind, that part of the body flings to the bed, the wall, whatever I’m surrounded by. I would start the thought of “okay, I’m going to try to slowly, carefully move my arm…” to try to slow down this speeding rollercoaster-type horrible experience, and in a blink of an eye, I’m not kidding, my arm would jerk so fast to who knows where. But, whenever this happened, I could feel a huge difference mentally and physically, like there definitely was something THERE controlling my movements and reading and controlling my thoughts. When you fast forward a movie or tape etc., you can see exactly how I felt during these times. Time was tremendously sped up… it’s the hardest thing to explain, but at these moments, the presence of time was so different… I got a somewhat airy, stomach-turning, feeling because I could actually feel time fast forwarding but my mind was kind of observing all of this, like it was on the outside, watching and feeling all of this happen. Well, even if you don’t understand fully what I’m trying to convey, hopefully you at least understand that, by this time, all of this made me extremely nauseous.
All my thoughts were focused around trying to slow myself down. I kept just thinking very slow thoughts and movements, then my mind slows down extremely abruptly and now I’m trying to speed myself up! When the slow phase happens, it almost feels like your dying. Even when I would blink, my eyelids seemed to be shut for ages because my actions were so incredibly slow. Often time when this happens I actually think that the fast part is better, but the whole experience is just absolutely horrifying. I feel like I can hardly breathe, and I can feel this enormous pressure all over my body, controlling my every move. I feel weak, dizzy, nauseous, out of breath… it is just indescribable!
After this happened a couple times, I tried to explain it to my family (I can imagine that I didn’t do too well, being that I was only 2), and I had referred to it as “the fast and slow thing”. Whenever my mom would come in my room and catch this episode happening, she didn’t know what to do, but she tried nearly everything. After a couple years, she started thinking that the cause of my pain could be demons, ghosts, the devil, etc., so when it would start again, she would call out “In the name of the Lord, I command you to leave!” And, miraculously, this usually worked about the third or fourth time she said it. When years passed and I became older, the “fast and slow thing” gradually started happening less and less until it was gone.
My girlfriends use to love pantsing boys after school. There were younger boys that we could over power and easy to pull their pants down. Most of them were so embarrassed to be exposed in their undeware, but two of them got those pulled down along with their pants. I guess they can't stop it, but in both cases as we pulled their pants and undies down they we were face with found out they had gotten hard ons.
I had been unemployed for several months, due to layoffs, and me wife said she was tired of carrying all the weight, and was leaving me. I got on my knees in front of her and begged her not to go. I bowed down and kissed her feet. She laughed at me and left. She came back a few days later to get some things, and I said I wanted to talk about "us" and please give me another chance. She got up to leave and again, I kneeled before and begged. This time she told me to kiss her feet. I did. I looked up and she was filming it with her phone. She lifted her foot and told me to lick the bottom of her shoe. I did, I begged her, please don't go, and licked her shoes, she filming the whole thing.
Now it's several months later, and I'm working, but she's threatened to show the video to my new employers, my neighbors and friends. To keep her from doing it, she's comes over sporadically and has me re-enact the whole thing over and over, but at least she's not filming it.
My name is Jim and my story is about getting abused in my own home by my 16 year old sister. I was 10 years old when she began to ask me personal questions to get me embarrassed. She knew I was shy and never would complain or talk to anyone about her embarrassing questions. So every time our parents would go out, she would ask me if I played with myself at night and if I had the hots for one of the girls in school. She had me blushing with all these questions and wanted to know if my dick was hard just talking about it. She told me I wasn't telling her the truth, because she spyed on me threw the window as I was yerking off to some porn in my cumputer and threaten to tell my parents. The minute I told her I would do anything to keep her from telling them, she knew I was trapped. The next time our parents wet out she took me to her room, pulled my pants down and watcht me get a hard on. The more sexual things she made me do, the more she knew I would do anything she wanted. We went to the same school and walked home two blocks to our apartment building, every day after school. One day I found her sitting in front of our building waiting for me to come home. She took me down to the basement were her two girlfriends were already waiting. She told her girlfriends all about the dirty things I did and would spread the word in school if I din't take my clothes off in front of them. They locked the door and told me hurry up and take them off. I swallowed my embarrassement and took my clothes off and had to stand naked rght in front of them. It was a turn on for my sister to thrill her friends by showing me off naked and told me to show them how I played with myself. I was so hard and excited , it just took a few strokes to shot my sperm all over the floor. I put my clothes back on and waiting a while before getting in the elevator. Two years passed and now my sister has a steady boyfriend, but we act like it never happened.
Today in my english class the teacher was talking and it was a good lecture; she's a good teacher. Well anyways this one guy got a tissue and was blowing his nose but all I heard was the noise and I didn't see what he was doing so I got this insane but hilarious image in my mind of this guy down on his knees, hands in the air using them as claws and hissing really loudly. I couldn't stop laughing, my face was red and tears coming out of my eyes and my teacher had no idea what I was doing or what was so funny. I think she thought I was laughing at her lecture. I didn't mean to offend her, but goddamn that was funny.
I'm 16 and my name is Anita. I went to a shool in Ingland for one year to practice my inglish and turned out to be the worst year I have ever had. I felt the whole school was against me and no one wanted to be friends with me. I constantly got picked on by other girls to make my life miserable. Some days my books would desapear or pages ripped off to embarrass me in class. One day after PE period, I came out of the shower to get dressed and my panties had been stolen. It was so horrible to know that every girl and boy knew, I was sitting in class with nothing under my skirt. Little did I khow that weeks latter they were going to humiliate me in such a horrible way, I would have to leave school. Like every day we would take showers after PE and would make sure to lock my clothes in the locker. They pulled me out of the shower and dragged me outside naked and sudently found myself getting displayed in front of a bunch of boys. They held me long enough in front of boys, making sure they got a good look before letting me run back inside. I felt so embarrassed and humiliated I never could go back to that school. I just wished that no one else would know what happened and never mentioned a word about it. I just din't want people to know what happen and embarrassing myself all over again.
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