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i've been on an emotional rollercoaster for the past eight months. i've been feeling vulnerable to all of my emotions like i never really got to express myself during the times i needed to say something. where do i begin telling you what i feel? i'm 22 years old and i still have my life ahead of me to live. but how can i move forward when there's certain parts of my life that haven't had any type of closure? i've been searching for peace so i can live again. i know this sounds really depressing and alittle pathetic and all but these emotions are real. i'm still finding myself as we speak. i've changed over the course of time which has allowed me to explore and experience everything that i make of my life. i'm at a turning point where the road splits into two different paths. i've fallen to the lowest point of my life once before where nothing seemed to be going anywhere for me. i've had high points in my life but i've fallen short in keeping them into play. now, what i wonder is where am i going from here? i'm living out on my own. i'm raising a little girl who seven years old. i work full time. i don't have a lively social life but i'm surrounded by people who care about me. but deep down i'm sad. and what is it i'm sad about? i have to ask myself why do i feel this way? why do i continuiously keep putting myself down when i've done nothing but kept myself up to par? there's something missing in my life. could it be i'm sick over love? am i really missing that part of my life? i've been hurt in the past. i've had my heart broken and i've broken hearts myself. i've done the dating scene more than enough to say i'm tired of having guys come in and out of my life like it's the thing to do. but what i'm proud of is i never had any of these guys come between my relationship with my daughter. they never met her but they heard stories of her. i kept her away from all of that because i knew guys would run away with a woman with baggage. i'm just tired of all the bullshit that has happened. i don't want to feel like this anymore. i'm so depressed; my feelings are being surpressed because will i ever find that one person who will actually care? i want to love again. i want to find that one person who gives me butterflies. i want to feel like i'm being swept off of my feet. i just want to be held close so i feel protected. i want to know that i can trust this man even when i don't know what's going to happen. i want it all. and i know i deserve it because i've dealt with enough bullshit to say i know what i want and i'm not falling short by not getting what it is that i need. and what's important too is i want to be able to give my love in return without feeling like i have to protect my heart from being broken again.
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Anonymous Coward says ...
I am an Anonymous Coward and I want to say ...
while i was reading this i was wondering if i posted it (except for the daughter part). my feelings, emotions, thoughts, everything that crosses my path for some reason seems to be depressing to me. i've recently asked myself the question of love. can i love someone again? do i need a girl to make me happy? but then when i do talk to a girl, THEY'RE not up to par. i think the problem with us is that we are looking for someone to make us happy. and when you're looking too hard, it leads to settling, and settlling doesn't lead to fulfillment. i think you should find a hobby, listen to music, read, learn anything, pray, and just let things come to you. we've kept up to par, but the world has gone mad. don't settle and the fairy tale unfold as time unravels and catches up. peace.
ID:6D0540
Anonymous Coward says ...
I am an Anonymous Coward and I want to say ...
i like that comment... hold on and let it come to you... keep going to fullfill yourself and you wont even notice what might hit you later. take care and dont over think and be too scared of love. let it flow
ID:A9298D
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